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Added April 23, 2014

Self Destructive Behavior: What You Should Know

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Telling a little white lie or taking something without permission isn’t a good choice, but they won't hurt you, right? Wrong. Eating until you make yourself sick is uncomfortable, but it's not really that big a deal, right? Wrong again.


These are examples of self-destructive behavior: Behaviors people knowingly do that will cause them to fail or bring them to trouble. They’re some things some of us may be struggling with on a regular basis. These behaviors can affect your relationships with family and friends, as things that seem minor now could affect the rest of your life if they become patterns of behavior that are difficult to change if left unchecked.


Do I Have Self-Destructive Behavior?

The term “self-destructive” can take on a variety of meanings. So long as you could be doing damage to yourself — physically, mentally or even your reputation — you may be engaged in self-destructive behavior. There is usually some problem with handling or expressing feelings when a person becomes self-destructive. The following are among the most common forms:



No matter the reason, taking something that doesn't belong to you is always wrong — whether it's from a store, a friend or your family.


With today's security technology, there's a very good chance that you will eventually get caught. Getting caught is really embarrassing, and the chances of getting off with just a warning aren't very good. As you get older, this self-destructive behavior can include a big fine or even jail.



Everyone tells little white lies from time to time. You may do it to spare your friend's feelings about her unflattering new outfit. A small lie can seem harmless. But what about lying to your parents to stay out of trouble? What about lying to impress your friends? When lying starts, trouble usually begins and the lying can continue. Things can get really complicated once you start trying to keep track of what you said and to whom.


Getting caught in a lie is the fastest way to lose people's trust. And those same people that you fought so hard to influence with your lies may never look at you the same way again. Before you even think about telling a lie, think about whether it’s worth it.


Stuffing Yourself

Indulging every now and then isn’t the problem. The problem occurs when you eat the entire bag of cookies and the whole quart of ice cream to keep from dealing with what's happening in your life. This is self-destructive behavior. You literally stuff down your feelings with food.


Overeating can seriously affect your health. There's the risk of diabetes and heart disease, even in young people. Some overeaters may purge (by throwing up, for example), leading to other medical problems.



Smoking is not cool and doesn't make you more attractive. In fact, it does just the opposite. It causes yellow teeth, yellow fingernails, bad breath and wrinkles.


Smoking is one of the worst things that you can do to your body. It's an addiction that's hard to stop, and it can have serious short- and long-term health risks like cancer.



Self-mutilation can include cutting into your skin, obsessively picking at your face or pulling your own hair.


Injuring yourself is very dangerous physically and mentally. Cutting your skin exposes you to the risk of serious infections and permanent scarring. Punishing yourself means that you can't emotionally handle some of what's going on in your life, and you need help to deal with it.


Self-mutilation is your way of asking for help. There are other ways to cope with difficulties. You can get help to learn to cope with what it is causing you so much pain. You need to speak with someone to help heal the wounds you can see and those that are invisible. Talking to a trusted adult and asking for the help you need is the first step to healing. This adult can help you get in touch with a mental health professional to start your healing process.


Justifying Your Actions

You may even be unaware the behavior is self-destructive. You may tell yourself that you don't have a problem, that you deserve a treat or that you can stop what you're doing at any time. Telling yourself these things will keep you from getting help. This, too, is self-destructive behavior.


Getting help for your problems may seem scary, but continuing your self-destructive behavior is scarier. It's frightening to be out of control.


Where to Get Help

You shouldn't feel ashamed if you have a problem or engage in self-destructive behavior. You should be proud of yourself for realizing that you need help and can ask for help.


Talk to your parents, a school counselor or other trusted adult. You probably won't get in trouble if you tell them you have a problem and need help. (You may get into trouble if you get caught doing self-destructive behavior).


An adult will be able to help you decide if this is something that you can stop on your own with their help or if you're going to need professional help.


The sooner you get help, the sooner you'll start to feel good again.

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comments so far
Posted August 02, 2014
I've selfed harmed since 5th grade (10 grade now) I stopped for a little bit, but the urge is always going to be there. My scgool actually found out and thats why I stopped, but now my mom doesn't pay attention so I still do it. I hate it but it's the onlything that helps me. My guidance counselor told my mom to take me to therapy, but she wont do that....
Posted October 23, 2013
I have cut for a long time and I honestly dont wanna stop I love watching my blood run down my arm Nobody wants to admit this but some of us like to cut it just makes us feel less sad and lost
Posted November 11, 2012
i feel sad because i feel like nobody likes me snd im really ugly i cant make friends
Posted June 21, 2012
the first time i stole something is when i was 9 yrs old. i stole a pencil then i know it was really bad to do that
Posted June 22, 2012
-Sadie. thx and true that! the sad thing is that not everyone feels that way. I know people that say "no one understands". I haven't really gone through things like this, but I'm an empathetic person. so maybe I do understand, maybe I don't. but no one deserves to be punished. god will love and forgive you no matter what. you just gotta ask. he gives us the tools to make greatness in our lives it all depends on how we use them. I hope things keep working out for you, and good luck to everyone out there! listen and b inspired by ppl like Sadie!
Posted June 21, 2012
@pikachu12. That u. It's people like u that make me smile. But don't be afraid to be YOU And if anyone hates on u from being u then just remember. They ra fake and jelous of who u r. Don't let opions hurt u. Cutting will be just a phase. Don't worry. This might inspire u cuz it did for me. Look up on YouTube: lullaby lyrics by nickleback BeYOU and no one else. We will unite as one and stop cutting all together. Speak up. It's now or never
Posted June 10, 2012
@sadie504: i'm so happy for you!!! you r right and a real inspiration!!!
Posted May 24, 2012
NO ONE EVER DESERVES TO BE PUNISHED!you r a living, breathing, beautiful person no matter what ANYONE says! words hurt, but find your inner strength. things will improve no matter how bad they seem. there is always the "eye of the storm", the calmest part. sometimes it takes longer to find it, but it will always be there. others may have to help you find it, so find someone, anyone, you trust and get help no matter what anyone else thinks.everyone has some really bad points in their lives, but you CAN get through it .it is your life and you only live once. make it count and make it last.
Posted June 09, 2012
i quit cutting myself, and i promised myself that since i quit, im never going back. i threw my blade away and all the other blades too. i know that it might be adiccting but if we all stop together we will unite. no one can stop us and we arent only doing something for ourselfs, we would be doing something for the world. we could be in history like martin luther king jr. if you stop that might get ur friends or family meembers to stop. ur not the only one and ur not going to be the only one stopping. get inspired if u feel the urge to cut then denie the acsess of that memory to your brain. the school year is over and we are going to leave behind bad habbits together as one WE WILL UNITE!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted June 14, 2012
One of my best friends started cutting herself. She has done it 4 times. The first cuz she and her boyfriend broke up and he almost committed suicide because of it. And after that it was cuz of some school drama and then family issues. Only like 5 people know about it and it's only her closest friends. She's only 12.... No adult knows abou it.... I really want to help her and everything but I don't know how. She goes to a different school than me and so does everyone else she told. I REALLY want to help her. But I want to help her first without adults involved because then she can get better with her friends help but I know if it doesnt get better than I'm going to have to tell some adult. Someone please help me!!!!
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