Your Perfect Quinceañera Checklist: Going on a date with a boy is scary enough. How does a girl ask one to be her escorte on such an important day?
Your big day is a big deal. Your dress, the guest list, your theme, the music, the food—you've put your heart and soul into planning the perfect event to mark your transition to womanhood. Picking an escorte for the party is a big deal, too. More than just arm candy (a cute boy who makes you look good), you want someone who makes your special day even more special.
So, how do you choose?
Pick someone you're comfortable with. The last thing you need in addition to your hostess duties is awkward silences while you try to entertain some guy you don't click with. The myth is that your escorte needs to be someone you have a romantic connection with. If you're not dating anyone at the time, you're better off picking a close friend than trying to reel in a crush or choosing someone you barely know. Think of the photos and video, which will stay with you for a lifetime. Your escorte will be in most of the pictures. You'll want that escorte to be someone you want to remember forever.
Once you choose, see our Quinceanera checklist of how to ask:
When you have your sights set on a possible date, find a time and place where there aren't any distractions. You'll both be most at ease if you pull him aside where no one else is around. Take a walk, call him to meet up somewhere or just catch him at his locker at the end of the day. If you can't find time or are too shy to ask him in person, call him on the phone. It doesn't have to be a big event. Keep it quick and casual for maximum comfort.
Be direct and be confident. When you're comfortable, it will put him at ease, too. If he doesn't already know about the party, tell him you are having a Quinceañera. You can talk a little about your plans—who will be there, when it is, and how excited you are for it. Then tell him you would like him to be your escorte.
When you ask, let him know whether this is a romantic invitation or an invitation as just friends. If it is a platonic (strictly friends) invitation, try something like this:
— "I'm so excited for the party and a little nervous, too. It would mean a lot to me to have a good friend like you as my escorte. I think we'd have a lot of fun!"
If it's a romantic invitation and you've never been on a date together, you should be upfront about that, too. Try this:
— "I'm so excited for the party, I hope you can be there. In fact, if you'd be interested, I was wondering if you would be my date."
If you get turned down, don't worry and don't beg him to reconsider. It's a lot of pressure to put on a guy to be an escorte for such an important event. The spotlight would be on him, parents are involved, and he may not be able to handle that situation. If you pressure him into escorting you, it could be awkward for both of you and that's not the memory you want to carry with you! Simply set your sights on another guy and go back to step 1. No hard feelings.
If he accepts, YAY! Let him know what special things you'll need him to do as your escorte, and keep him in the loop when things change or times are set. If you're just friends, this will definitely bring you closer. If you're starting a new relationship, keep it casual and simple before the big day. Whether you're a couple or just a couple of friends, you want to be comfortable and confident with your escorte by your side!