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Added August 01, 2013

Mother and Daughter Relationships

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"We're either best friends or worst enemies. There's no in-between. Sometimes we can discuss the future in civilized and intimate ways. We connect and hug and laugh so hard; we're in perfect synch. Then, other times, we can't even be in the same room without insulting each other. She's controlling, bossy, and constantly in my face, never listening or respecting what I have to say."

 

Sound familiar? Without a doubt, mother and daughter relationships are the most intense of all relationships, often turning their home into a battleground during adolescence. Whether the reasons for intense mother and daughter relationships are physical (some believe the dueling hormones of menstruation and menopause contribute to the strife) or societal (just when girls need independence, their moms need connection), the troubled bond is too important to ignore.

 

The good news is, according to Psychology Today, despite conflicts and complicated emotions, the mother and daughter relationship bond is so strong that 92% of adult women report positive mother and daughter relationships. What can you do today to improve the state of your union? Here are a few suggestions.

 

Choose your battles carefully, and wait to find a good time to speak about what's troubling you. You might say, "Mom, there's something really important I need to discuss with you. When would be a good time for us to talk? Use a respectful tone and listen carefully, even if what you're hearing is not making you happy. No eye rolling. Just because you come from different generations and have different outlooks, doesn't mean mother and daughter can't be heard and understood.

 

Make time for mother and daughter relationships. Mommy and me classes should continue throughout your lives. Join a book club. Take a cooking class. Start a fitness regimen. Try out for a play together. Friendship and learning with mother and daughter relationships go hand in hand.

 

Volunteer together. Helping others often brings out the best in people, making us thankful for what we have and for those in our lives we love.

 

Write to each other. If there is something you find difficult to say, send a thoughtfully constructed written message to clear the air.

 

Show appreciation for mother and daughter relationships. When Mother's Day or your mom's birthday is near, you have the perfect opportunity. Don't be afraid to go the sentimental route. Spend time choosing the perfect card, and then think about what you want to say on this once-a-year occasion. Include yourself and your relationship with your mom in the gift you pick out. Picture frames filled with a shared tradition or memory always works. What about a motherhood box: a chest for her to fill with her favorite keepsakes with compartments and pouches for everything from a lock of hair to your first report card. At your local print center, you can make personalized placemats, mouse pads, or travel mugs with photocopied birth certificates and favorite snapshots. Of course you can never go wrong with the old standbys: flowers, breakfast in bed, or a piece of jewelry!

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sweetsani16
sweetsani16
Posted July 09, 2012
this book has inspired me the mother daughter book club its about how daughters and moms bonding togrther
Irish_unicorn
Irish_unicorn
Posted July 02, 2012
Honestly, I'm not to fond of my mom. I mean, she's nice but she just docent know when to mind her own business. She's way too uptight. She's gotten me to the point of yelling at her because she didn't want my friend to go w/ me 2 karate... She was talking like the reason was obvious and I didn't understand so I asked her to explain then she got mad at my slowness and that's when I started yelling. Also, When she gets mad she says really hurtful stuff, she caught me in my room crying once and she asked what I was doing and I told her I was crying and her response to that was 'well, your not allowed to cry, pull yourself together and take a shower.' she apologized 4 both later but still... I prefer dad.
missethiopia_123
missethiopia_123
Posted March 18, 2012
somtimes me and my mom yell our hearts out and somtimes we just hug and laugh with each other 4 all the grls that feel like their moms ignore them and stuff then i recommend a book called the wedding planners daughter it isnt long the width is about a centimeter
livlafluvdancestar
livlafluvdancestar
Posted May 05, 2012
It seems Luke when I need my mom she isn't there and when I don't need here shes there.... but honestly when we r buddy buddy, it means the world to me.
Kelulu
Kelulu
Posted March 08, 2012
Sometimes I feel embarrased to ask my mom something. And yeah my mom and I fight but at the end of the day, I love my mom.
Arthritisisablessing
Arthritisisablessing
Posted March 25, 2012
My mom can get mad at the slightest thing. She gets mad that I don't joke and play around with her a lot, and she gets mad when I joke and play around too much. Then, I get mad that she's mad, and she doesn't listen to what I have to say. She yells and cusses and doesn't even care if I cry. She treats me like a baby. I'm thirteen and I had to sit and watch happy feet two with her today! UHHHHHHGGGGGG
wazzzupbuttercup
wazzzupbuttercup
Posted February 04, 2012
OMG!!! like im adopted and all the time i feel like i can never see eye to eye with my mom and its always like im grounded or somthing stupid like that.I cant stay in the same room with her for 1 minute without aguing with her.she impulsive alway in my buisness she even reads my text messages its horrable i cant stand her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PeaceLoveLaughter
PeaceLoveLaughter
Posted February 24, 2012
Wazzzupbuttercup I'm adopted too and I know exactly how you feel my mom is so annoying and nosey she hated when I touched the walls kept my friends secrets from my little sister and didnt even like the idea of me getting a phone and hated some of the kids I hung out with but she really loves and cares for you and just cause your adopted doesn't mean that she loves you any less if you two were biological. My mom died about a year ago from breast cancer and all she wanted to do was raise me and see me grow up and I'd trade everything I own for her to be here right now with me cause I'd have so many things to tell her and truly you don't know what you have until it's gone... So enjoy her I know you love her and that's good cause she loves you back and I only got my mom until I was 11...
PeaceLoveLaughter
PeaceLoveLaughter
Posted February 24, 2012
DreamCatcher1912 I know it seems like you hate your mom like me and my mom would get in so many fights it's like a screamo concert at our house but you really hate what she's doing I felt like that like my mom didn't understand or listened to a word that came out of my mouth she liked ruffles on skirts and I like purple skinny jeans but in the end when she's not there you'll realize you love her even when you guys were at each other the most ;)
Californiaaa8<3(:
Californiaaa8<3(:
Posted January 05, 2012
me and my mom havent really ever had the best relationship. sometimes i feel trapped and like i need her, but she isnt there. when i try to talk to her about things i feel like she is ignoring me and doesnt care. i know my mom loves me, but sometimes it just doesnt seem it. i just wish there was a way to communicate better and have a good relationship. Alls she does is compare me to other people and doesnt relize that this is who i am. its really stressful :(
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