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Added December 27, 2011

Keeping A Secret

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Let's be honest: We love to know things that others don't. Secrets are a fact of life. The problems occur when keeping a secret becomes challenging. When someone tells us something in confidence, it's because he or she trusts us enough to listen and keep our mouth shut. When we don't, trust is lost. Part of growing up is learning to distinguish the times when revealing information makes you a snitch from the times when telling a secret (such as when a friend's health and safety is at stake) might be the right thing to do.

 

A recent study of 3,000 women in England found that four in ten women had trouble keeping a secret, no matter how personal or confidential the news was. And two-thirds ended up feeling guilty after spilling the beans.


Keeping a Secret
Why do people keep secrets?
People may worry that if certain information is known, they will be judged or looked down upon or that someone will use that information against them.

Keeping a Secret
Is there a difference between a good secret and a bad secret?
Yes. A good secret is not harmful to you or anyone else. Examples would be keeping a secret about an upcoming surprise party or a wrapped Christmas present. All kinds of personal information including passwords, address and phone numbers when you're online should remain private. A bad secret might concern a friend or family member who is in trouble and risking her health and safety. Whether it's drug-related or bad-crowd-related, those secrets that make anyone feel scared, uncomfortable, sad, or angry should be shared.

Keeping a Secret
How can you do the noble, trustworthy thing when keeping a piece of juicy information to yourself is so hard?
You'll quickly get a reputation as a gossipmonger if you start talking bad about others behind their back. If you get into this habit, chances are you are going to blurt out someone's secrets. Fight the urge to spill. Walk away, bite your lip, or change the subject. Think of yourself as a loyal and trustworthy person.

  • Tell a white lie if you have to. Try to forget about the secret. The less it's on your mind, the easier it is when keeping a secret.
  • Talk about the secret with the person who told it to you. Discussing it should help quiet the urge to share it with others.


Keeping a Secret
What if you blurt out a friend s secret?
Apologize. No excuses. Nothing beats sincerity. Even if you're being yelled at, try not to lose your temper. Take the blame, say you're sorry, and learn from the experience never to make the same mistake again.

Keeping a Secret
Can keeping a secret be bad for you?
Yes. Keeping a secret can cut you off from others. If you have to keep a difficult secret for a long time, it can provoke anxiety and worry. Living with these emotions can lead to stress, which can lead to stomachaches and headaches.

Sometimes with secrets there are no easy answers. Part of growing up is making that hard decision to keep silent. But that hardship is important in helping us define who we are and what we believe in.

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katyperryfan12301
katyperryfan12301
Posted May 16, 2012
Im good at keeping secrets like I havent told ANYBODY (no one, not even my family) this secret a girl told me in 1st grade. I know alot of secrets the only time I told a secret was when it put me and my x-friend in danger/ could get us harmed.
Cat.S
Cat.S
Posted May 16, 2012
I know right
Ivy.Horan
Ivy.Horan
Posted May 16, 2012
Oh hey Catastrophe! Vas Happenin?
jay swagg
jay swagg
Posted May 08, 2012
same here dude im already in enough trouble so far as friend ship
Moo(:
Moo(:
Posted May 07, 2012
If I share a secret, my friend would kill me!
Moo(:
Moo(:
Posted May 07, 2012
Also, I wanna give a tip. If you really can't keep a secret, you should say it to yourself, or a wall. I know it sounds silly, but it works for me. And you know a wall can't share secrets with other walls. Haha. Say it about 5 times until you feel relieved!Hope this works. It works for me. :)
Hellokitty555
Hellokitty555
Posted May 05, 2012
i have like two close friends who arent even close. one of them is open with me, and doesnt tell. im good at keeping secrets because im really bad at making and keeping friends, so no one tells me anything and i dont talk to them anyway
Buggy12
Buggy12
Posted April 23, 2012
My friend was always a good girl, well now shes 15 and hanging out with this guy that is 15 and not that good... they went swimming, just by themselves... and she is ignoring all her friends and family.. I am sooo scared that the next time I talk to her she will be pregnant.... :(
319princess
319princess
Posted April 17, 2012
@Grace of Lerua, thank you SO much!!! sorry it took so long, I rarely come on anymore. I will try to remember this next time. :)
baby v ymcmb
baby v ymcmb
Posted April 14, 2012
i really haate when the people i trust the most tell my secrets. its true maybe some has slipped but i make sure its not shown up on line i love my bffs and something they tell me it reminds me they trust me with it even if its personal!!!!!!!!
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