BeingGirl Points - Major Bragging Rights

Close
Show everyone what a superstar you are by racking up BeingGirl points. The more active you are on the site—taking quizzes and polls, playing games, commenting on articles, and submitting questions to Ask the Experts—the more points you’ll earn.
My Relationships

Friends

http://media.beinggirl.comSign in to ask the Experts

« Back to Articles

Added August 01, 2013

Keeping A Secret

  • ViewsIcon 30317
  • CommentIcon. 208
RatingStarIcon

Let's be honest: We love to know things that others don't. Secrets are a fact of life. The problems occur when keeping a secret becomes challenging. A recent study found that four in 10 women had trouble keeping a secret, no matter how personal or confidential the news was. And two-thirds ended up feeling guilty after spilling the beans.

 

When someone tells us something in confidence, it's because he or she trusts us enough to listen and keep our mouth shut. When we don't, trust is lost. Part of growing up is learning to distinguish the times when revealing information makes you a snitch from the times when telling a secret (such as when a friend's health and safety is at stake) might be the right thing to do.


Keeping a Secret
Why do people keep secrets?
People may worry that if certain information is known, they will be judged or looked down upon or that someone will use that information against them.

Keeping a Secret
Is there a difference between a good secret and a bad secret?
Yes. A good secret is not harmful to you or anyone else. Examples would be keeping a secret about an upcoming surprise party or a wrapped Christmas present. All kinds of personal information including passwords, address and phone numbers when you're online should remain private. A bad secret might concern a friend or family member who is in trouble and risking her health and safety. Whether it's drug-related or bad-crowd-related, those secrets that make anyone feel scared, uncomfortable, sad, or angry should be shared.

Keeping a Secret
How can you do the noble, trustworthy thing when keeping a piece of juicy information to yourself is so hard?
You'll quickly get a reputation as a gossipmonger if you start talking bad about others behind their back. If you get into this habit, chances are you are going to blurt out someone's secrets. Fight the urge to spill. Walk away, bite your lip, or change the subject. Think of yourself as a loyal and trustworthy person.

  • Tell a white lie if you have to. Try to forget about the secret. The less it's on your mind, the easier it is when keeping a secret.
  • Talk about the secret with the person who told it to you. Discussing it should help quiet the urge to share it with others.


Keeping a Secret
What if you blurt out a friend s secret?
Apologize. No excuses. Nothing beats sincerity. Even if you're being yelled at, try not to lose your temper. Take the blame, say you're sorry, and learn from the experience never to make the same mistake again.

Keeping a Secret
Can keeping a secret be bad for you?
Yes. Keeping a secret can cut you off from others. If you have to keep a difficult secret for a long time, it can provoke anxiety and worry. Living with these emotions can lead to stress, which can lead to stomachaches and headaches.

Sometimes with secrets there are no easy answers. Part of growing up is making that hard decision to keep silent. But that hardship is important in helping us define who we are and what we believe in.

Close
 
 
Rate this:
208
comments so far
awesomegirl1
awesomegirl1
Posted July 29, 2014
thanks! that was great advice
Kateline
Kateline
Posted July 24, 2014
GirlyGirl126 If you have a problem with your friend liking other girls then you should tell her that you do. Just be nice about it. Say that she means alot to you but you just need to get used to the fact that she is different. My best friend is a lesbian and she used to hit on me until I told her that I dident like her hitting on me and that I would support her whenever and stick up for her.
Zunie
Zunie
Posted June 16, 2014
Hey guys);
GirlyGirl126
GirlyGirl126
Posted June 23, 2014
hey if anyone has any questions ask me :)and by any chance does anyone feel uncomfortable with a girl who likes other girls i have a friend who likes other girls how do i tell her that i dont want to be friends with her anymore
Dawn6268
Dawn6268
Posted June 30, 2014
Thanks GirlyGirl126, that really helped.
XxMewMewGirlxX
XxMewMewGirlxX
Posted June 30, 2014
GirlyGirl126 you shouldn't not want to be friends with her just because she is ahem.... yeah... well if she is mean or something, that's when you shouldn't be friends with her. ~MewMew
Joyful Girl
Joyful Girl
Posted January 07, 2014
I feel secrets are important in some cases! Some secrets that I've been told, I had to tell because the secret was going to harm someone in some way. I've asked few people (only those who I can trust completely) to keep secrets. Mostly God and my diary know my secrets, but sometimes I just have to tell one of my adult friends my secret. Also, I've been asked to keep many secrets.
Joyful Girl
Joyful Girl
Posted January 07, 2014
I also agree with Britt7731!! Right on!!! :)
GirlyGirl126
GirlyGirl126
Posted June 16, 2014
Dawn6268,what you need to do is just go up to your other friends that she lied to is go up to them and say hey im sorry but i hope that you can just hear me out and the other girl lied to you guys and shes lied to a lot of others and she just doesnt want to tell the truth im so sorry i hope you belive me. and just look sad and walk away they'll belive you right away.hope it helped bye :)
Dawn6268
Dawn6268
Posted June 07, 2014
I have a friend who really isn't nice to me and I cant tell her secrets and all of my friends cant hang out with me because of her. She literally won't let me be alone with one of my friends for 2 seconds and she tells lies about me to them all the time so they don't like me anymore, she tells lies all the time and won't admit the truth. When ever I try to tell her I don't want to be her friend anymore she makes up a reason why I cant or she blackmails me. What should I do?
BeingGirl Monthly Sweepstakes
Unlock the BG Newsletter
Tampax Training Camp
Watch Videos
Invisible Protection Invisible fit. Radiant you.
See what other girls are asking about relationships
See what other girls are asking about relationships
Todays Hot Poll
What do you usually wear to school?
160096438
Leggings
Jeans
Skirt
Dress
Shorts
Uniform
find this quiz and more
GO
Are you a
daddy's girl?
bbblink

BeingGirl.com

close

In order to get the best possible experience using this website, we
recommend that you use Internet Explorer 7 or above. You may
download it here.