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Getting Along With Parents

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Dear BeingGirl Experts,

My parents are really ticking me off, and my best friend feels the same way! We want to know how we can resolve our "issues" without blowing up at them sometimeswe just want to get in their faces and scream at them. When we were younger, we never really did this. Why is it that we almost hate our parents? Please help.

Harper

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Dear Harper,

As you are learning being a teen is fun and difficult. Being the parent of a teen is fun and difficult, too. Your parents dislike the fights and difficult times just like you do. You’ll probably bring a smile to your parents face when you let them know you want to get along.

Some ideas you may find helpful when dealing with your parents include:

  • Avoid starting sentences with, "Everyone else..." Your parents care about what's best for YOU.
  • Be agreeable when possible. Look for opportunities to say, "That's true," or, "Good idea," or "I see what you mean."
  • Give occasional compliments. Even "That looks nice," or "That was a great meal," can lift a mood and mean a lot to your parents.
  • Be as responsible as you can be. When you act like an adult, this will likely help your parents see you the way you want to be seen.
  • Finally, don't always try to have the last word. It is not easy to change patterns, but it is possible.

When a situation with your parents or anyone for that matter is escalating, try to remember the acronym, H-A-L-T. Don't have a heavy conversation when either of you are H (hungry), A (angry), L (lonely), or T (tired). Perhaps you and your parents can agree to this before getting into a disagreement.

Hope this is helpful,

Your BeingGirl Experts

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comments so far
Whovianss
Whovianss
Posted March 29, 2014
Anyone watch doctor who????
Muklukmoshimash
Muklukmoshimash
Posted September 02, 2012
I only live with mom and she's really mean when she gets angry and even hits me, and no one knows there's no body to witness it. I feel so alone all of the time, I've talked to her about anger management classed and she just exploded. I live in fear every day worrying if she'll hit me or swear at me.
godtalksforever:D
godtalksforever:D
Posted July 27, 2012
i have extremely long hair that is such a pain to take care of. my mom says when she was little she suffered cuz she had so much hair. and yet she wont let me cut mine! Like im not suffering either!!!
MeatLover2000<3
MeatLover2000<3
Posted January 31, 2012
my parents wont let me do anything!!!!!they wont even let me go 2 the mall with my best friend!!!!!mayb when they were teens they stayed inside and did nothing but not in this generation!!!!!!
MeatLover2000<3
MeatLover2000<3
Posted January 31, 2012
i agree with all the coments below me.i wish i could just go off 2 college already!!!!!no way am i ending up like my mom!!!!!
jgirlxoxo101
jgirlxoxo101
Posted January 28, 2012
so i get in trouble for the absolute dumbest things ever! like i went to this party because my mom was friends with the girls who was having its mom and all the moms were hanging out, so i had to go and the girl whos house it was at i dont like, and she invited all her friends, who i also dont like. and the entire night none of them talked to me, not once, they didnt even look at me and when i went home and told my parents that i got in trouble for being rude! I got in trouble when all the while it totally was NOT my fault.
Xx_insane_xX
Xx_insane_xX
Posted July 20, 2011
No way I'm ending up like my mom!
Kylesgirl
Kylesgirl
Posted May 26, 2011
same here!
Luv_ICONicBoyz
Luv_ICONicBoyz
Posted November 20, 2011
My dad is so mean! He is mean to me, my brother, and my mom. He is even mean to my dog! We are basically living in fear , waiting for the next moment for him to explode and blow up in our faces! I'm tired of it.........
EMMY13
EMMY13
Posted August 24, 2011
my parents r soo mean i am surprised i haven't killed myself yet. i do not want to b her when i am older. but she does let me have huge games of manhunt at night
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