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Fighting With Mom: How To Get Along

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Dear BeingGirl Experts,

My Mom and I always seem to get in fights. No matter how much I try to get along with her, it never works. I think that sometimes she favors my sister. I get grounded all the time, and my sister can do the same thing and get away with it, no problem. Do you have any idea what I should do?

 

Bailey

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Dear Bailey,

Being a teen is fun and hard. Just as being a mom is fun and hard. Chances are mom dislikes the fights and times of conflict as much as you do. Several ideas may be helpful when dealing with mom:

  • Avoid starting sentences with, "Everyone else..." because this pushes parents' buttons. 
  • Agree sometimes and say, "That's true," or, "Good idea," or "I see what you mean."
  • Give occasional compliments. Even "That looks nice," or "That was a great meal," can lift a mood.
  • Be as grown up as you can. When you act like an adult, this will likely bring out the adult in your mom too.
  • Don’t get an attitude when you don’t get your way—you know the attitude she dislikes, and it’s the one I am referring to.
  • Don't try to have the last word.

 

It is not easy to change patterns, but it is possible.

 

Hope this helps,

Your BeingGirl Experts

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abbybear_315
abbybear_315
Posted June 30, 2014
my mum and i kinda fight but she is upset with me with a lot of things i don't even know what. When she is upset with me there is NO communication that it feels like i am in a mental room with soft padded walls and no one else is there with me so all i have is my phone, computer, and xbox.
biggleefan1212
biggleefan1212
Posted June 30, 2012
Me and my mom always get into fights over the littlest things so thank you! this is helpful (:
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