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Eating Disorders

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Added August 01, 2013

Eating Disorder Stories

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Ever since I can remember, I was classified as the "big girl." Being 5'11" in my grade eight class, I towered over the majority of my classmates. I had always been a health-conscious person, but the stress of being big got to me. It reached the point where I was eating close to nothing and exercising excessively. It didn't hit me at the time that this was the opposite of normal healthy behavior. In fact, I was proud of myself for being so committed to my healthy lifestyle change. My mom booked a doctor's appointment for me when she had discovered that I had not had a period in over four months. This established the beginning of my journey through anorexia nervosa.

The night before, my mom and I had been casually conversing in her bed when she expressed her worry in my drastic weight loss. "It's not right, you don't deserve to be living like this," she insisted. "I've researched this, you have the majority of the symptoms of an eating disorder, of a disease." I bawled, I screamed, I yelled. I didn't want to believe it. The next thing I knew, I was sitting in a doctor's office to begin treatment for my eating disorder.

"When do you suppose this all started? Have you ever used laxatives? What's your opinion on all of this?"

 

My doctor suffocated me with questions. I was still trying to process the reality of actually having an eating disorder. My doctor threatened me by saying that I couldn't play soccer if I had not reached a specific weight by the time the season started. She mentioned that with all of the harm I had done to myself, my heart had grown significantly weak, and it could literally stop at any second. I was not only battling a disease, I was fighting for my life. I was hurting more than just myself; I was hurting my friends and family. A part of me knew that there was room for change, but deep down there was still a part of me that was hesitant. I can recall holding a boy's hand that I liked at the time and feeling the warmth of his hands against my icy, cold palms. I was disgusted because I knew that meant that he ate.

Nonetheless, within six months, I was physically recovered having successfully reached my ultimate goal weight. Deep down, I didn't want it to be over. Anorexia was a comforting lifestyle for me. I liked feeling vulnerable, yet, so in control in my own skin. Little did I realize, the life in me was fading before my eyes.

One thing I learned is anorexia is not an option. You don't just wake up one day and say, "I think I'm going to be anorexic today!" It is far beyond a desire to lose weight. Growing up is hard; I'm not going to sugarcoat it. Our bodies are in constant change. Suddenly, mounds are forming on your chest and we're growing hair in places we never thought possible. Reality is everyone is going through it. If you thought you were a freak for growing hair on your legs, then I guess we're all freaks.

Over the past four years, I have carried tendencies from my eating disorder. However, all I was doing was setting myself up for failure. It's important to be conscious of what you are putting into your body, but not to the point of obsession. Treat yourself to that chocolate sundae. You'll find that once you've satisfied your craving, you will lose your desire for it entirely. I learned that the hard way after having battled many binges, occasionally resulting in purging.

There isn't a day that passes by that I don't think about my weight. There isn't a day I won't wish I could be my slender self again. There isn't a day when I am not thankful that my mother caught me soon enough. I believe my struggles have helped me to become the person I am today. I have never felt more at ease and confident in the growing woman that I am. I still have my "fat days" and get down on myself periodically, but that's only normal. We, as humans, are critical creatures. Use it as constructive criticism with the right intentions. Set your mind on goals and passions instead of calories and deceiving images. Blossom into the powerful woman you were placed on this earth to be.

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danielaQ
danielaQ
Posted May 12, 2014
You guys think 5lb. Is overweight? I'm 20 lb overweight ???? That's how fat I am ??????????
cutie345
cutie345
Posted November 18, 2013
When I eat like a snack or something, I sometimes feel like I eat too much. Usually, I eat the rest of my snack and throw the thought away for later. But a few days ago before school, I had thought that I shouldn't eat. Like, anything. I actually was thinking about skipping breakfast, "forgetting" to pack lunch, and just pushing around my food at dinner. Afterwards, I felt terrible. How could I do that to myself?
SierraM123
SierraM123
Posted July 03, 2013
It seems to me, that almost all girls in my class are skinny, and me? Im curvy, and soon I am about to be wearing junior sizes when most of my class wears like 10/12 or even the super skinny girls wear 7/8. I wear 14/16. I think i should starve. I Never eat breakfast, or eat very little. I am also embrassed eating in front of others...
BeingRealChic876
BeingRealChic876
Posted March 18, 2013
im 14 years old, i rarley eat breakfat or lunch and am 5'3. My frienda are worried i have an eating disorder, i keep reassuring them, but now they think that i am doing it to get attention..im not just sayin. but i always binge after a long day, and some days i get reallly hungry! is this an eating disorder?????
JollyRancher16
JollyRancher16
Posted April 29, 2013
I recently quit, but I used to starve myself. Last time I checked, I weighted 110 pounds and I NEVER looked at the scale. I was terrified. Because I knew, that if I gained any weight, I would flip out and go insane. It may sound stupid or crazy but not many know that I starved myself. I hate the topic. Because people thing I have, or had, a problem. A disorder. Which I don't. I know I don't. My own mom doesn't know. How can I tell my mom I starved, cut, and was horribly depressed? I feel like I let her down.. She tries so hard to make life good for me, knowing that she went through a very rough past. She was raped by her half-cousin at the age of 12. She was born pre-mature and when she was born, she basically lived in the hospital. Not being able to move from being beaten and malnourished. I feel so selfish.. Anyway, I shouldn't have done it, but I did, and I guess its bad but I honestly don't regret it. I lost a lot of weight which made me happy. Thats all I wanted. Was to be happy..
iloveharrystyles
iloveharrystyles
Posted January 03, 2013
please delete my account!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
sweetkitty14
sweetkitty14
Posted October 09, 2012
I'm 15, height: 5'4 and weigh barely 100 lbs, but it's not like im on a diet or starving. No matter how much I eat (which is a lot) , I just don't get fat. You might think I'm lucky, but I don't think so. Being skinny has made me feel unatractive on many occasions but I'm learning to accept it. I started noticing that in 7th grade, when i was 12. In 3rd period, I took a girl's favorite seat, and she got really mad, so she called me a 'stupid anorexic'. I was really upset, and I told my mom about it...and she asked me something interesting: "Don't you think that's what she is?" I realized she was taller and skinnier than I was! Often, people insult others because they have little self-esteem themselves. I'm thin, I know, but it won't be like that permanently. As I have seen from my parent's photos, you won't look like a teenager forever.
sweetkitty14
sweetkitty14
Posted October 09, 2012
Danseur914: Of course your not anorexic! You're just thin because that's the way your body naturally works. Same here too: my period is regular, I feel fine, and I eat healthy mostly, and try to stay active. The important thing is to be balanced, both in diet and exercise, and to work with your metabolism.
iloveharrystyles
iloveharrystyles
Posted January 03, 2013
Tech_Geek111 no
iloveharrystyles
iloveharrystyles
Posted January 03, 2013
does anyone no how to delete your account
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